March 8, 2023

 March 8, 2023

     If it isn't one thing, it is another. Now my ex Thelma has decided to go to Violet, the person that is occupying a location my name is on, and start more shit. Thelma did what so many people do. Tell a little bit of truth while lying about the rest. The best way lies are made to be believable. Violet is transgender. I often would still say "she" though vs. "he." (Keep in mind my RL kid goes by "They/Them," and I still mess up and say "she"). But Thelma told him that I misgender him all the time (true, and I admitted that and apologized) but then said I was confused about their gender (false) and that they also are confused about their own gender (false). Then I get another call from Violet saying why am I telling people his business like I'm glad he paid on the place a few months ago. Told me it wasn't my business to tell. At the time of the call, I was shocked and just said I was sorry. Once I hung up, hubby reminded me that I said something because it is my business too, BCS; if he and the others DON'T pay, it goes against OUR credit too! 

     Right then, I decided I would just go back to my bubble. Seems like when all I did was work in the virtual world, I didn't get into half this crap. And now I have had 3 people in a row try and destroy me. All of them I should never have brought back into my life. Giving people a second chance is not worth it. If they left on bad terms, then don't look back. 

     So here I am, admitting to my faults, and it is simple. I talked too much to people I thought I trusted. I would say things I probably shouldn't be saying. Often I was dumb and commiserated with one set of people to another set when I would be upset at them like the people I was talking to. I would not always say nice things. Often someone would say something nasty, and I would follow suit. Especially if I was upset as well. Do I talk behind people's backs when I am upset? Yes, I have. And I would say too much more often than not. 

     Then when the person has a bad break from me, they would go to the ones that were talked about and tell them any stories they can to get more people pissed off at me. An endless cycle that I need to stay clear of. Obviously, trust is a loose word. Makes you wonder who you can "REALLY" trust in a virtual world. 

     Now don't get me wrong. I found 1 person I trust more than life that I met In a virtual world: my husband. But I did not even start trusting him till he lived with me and proved himself. So why am I trusting others? Especially the ones you have a bad break within the best and return. You should stay clear of those people since trust is such a loose word. 

     Now my anxiety is through the roof. As bad as it was when I was dealing with Marjorie back in Oct/ Nov. So back to my bubble where I am safe and speaks to almost no one. There is literally a handful of people I do trust, and they have been with me for years and never turned their backs on me. But outside of them, I give up. 

Till Next time ..